Blog Posts - Joke Of The Day

Blowing Bubbles

 There were three ducks swiming in a pond one night after midnight and got arrested for trespassing. They were called to apper in court the next day so the judge called up duck #1 and asked what were you doing in a pond swiming after midnight...
by n-yo-face on Apr 6, 2016

Quote of the Day for Parents about kids with Image

Kids are watching and learning. Model the behaviors that you want to see. Teach them with your actions. We must teach the behaviors that we want to see… not just with your own kids, but all kids.Teach them well.The post Quote of the Day for Par...
by Suvichar Anmol Vachan on Jan 21, 2016

The Mafia Boss

An Arizona Highway Patrol officer stops a Harley for traveling faster than the posted speed limit, so he asks the biker his name.'Fred,' he replies.'Fred what?' the officer asks.'Just Fred,' the man responds.The officer is in a good mood, thinks he m...
by n-yo-face on Jan 15, 2016

The Accidental Monkey

A police officer came upon a terrible wreck where the driver and passenger had been killed.As he looked upon the wreckage a little monkey came out of the brush and hopped around the crashed car.The officer looked down at the monkey and said "I wish y...
by n-yo-face on Dec 1, 2015

Sexual Exhaustion

A high-school English teacher reminded her class of the final exam that would be given the following day.She told the class that there would be no excuse for not showing up, except for serious injury or illness, or a death in the stude...
by n-yo-face on Nov 24, 2015

Strip Down

When I was at the checkout and ready to pay for my groceries the cashier said,"Strip down, facing me."Making a mental note so I could complain to my local MP about this security rubbish, I did just as she had instructed.After the shrieking and hyster...
by n-yo-face on Nov 17, 2015

Don't Stop!

Daughter: Mom.... I am pregnant...Mom: Did I not tell you to say DON'T! when he touches you boob, and to say STOP! when he touches your vagina?!Daughter: Yes...but he was touching both so it came out "Don't stop! Don't stop!".
by n-yo-face on Nov 10, 2015

Top Ten Reasons Why Trick-or-Treating is Better Than Sex

10. You are guaranteed to get at least a little something in the sack. 9. If you get tired, wait ten minutes and go back at it again. 8. The stranger you look, the easier it is to get some.7. You don't hav...
by n-yo-face on Nov 2, 2015

Hazards Of A Taxi Driver

One rainy spring night in Dublin, a taxi driver spotted an arm waving from the shadows of an alley.Even before he rolled to a stop at the curb, a figure leaped into the car and slammed the door.Checking his rear view mirror as he pulled away, he was...
by n-yo-face on Oct 27, 2015

Lion Tamer Wanted

A circus owner runs an advert for a ‘lion tamer wanted’ and two people show up.  One is a retired golfer in his late-sixties and the other is a drop-dead, gorgeous brunette in her mid-twenties with a killer body The circus owner tells t...
by n-yo-face on Oct 21, 2015

Just A Good Deed

A guy is at the Pearly Gates, hoping to be admitted, and St. Peter says to the guy, "I can't see that you did anything really good in your life, but you never did anything bad either. I tell you what, if you can tell me one really good deed that you...
by n-yo-face on Sep 15, 2015

Reload That Gun

A guy walked into a crowded bar, waving his 1911 Colt  pistol  and yelled, "I have a .45 Colt with an eight shot clip and I want to know who's been screwing my wife?"A voice from the back of the room called out..."You'll need more ammo!"...
by n-yo-face on Sep 8, 2015

Mujibar Gets Job

Mujibar was trying to get a job in India.The Personnel Manager said, 'Mujibar, you have passed all the tests, except one.It is a simple test of your English language skills.Unless you pass it , you cannot qualify for this job.'Mujibar said, 'I am rea...
by n-yo-face on Sep 1, 2015

The Wine Taster

At a winery, the regular taster died and the director started lookingfor a new one to hire.A drunkard with a ragged, dirty look came in to apply for the position.The director of the winery wondered how to send him away.  He gave him a glass of w...
by n-yo-face on Aug 25, 2015

Eating Grass

One afternoon, a man was riding in the back of his limousine when he saw two men eating grass by the road side.He ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate."Why are you eating grass?" he asked one man."We don't have any money for food.
by n-yo-face on Aug 12, 2015

New Website – Come Hither –

markhayes.tvFiled under: Acting, Art, Bahanaramas, Book, Enough Talk, Enough Talk More Music!!!, Hollywood, Ireland, Joke Of The Day, LA Life, LA Living, Mark Hayes, Mark Hayes Comedian, Mexico, More Music!!!, Music, Podcast, PreDumb, Random Rambling...
by Enough Talk, More Writing on Aug 11, 2015

Trip To Walmart

A husband and wife are shopping in their local Wal-Mart. The husband picks up a case of Miller beer and puts it in their cart."What do you think you're doing?” asks the wife."They're on sale, only $10 for 24 cans”, he replies. "Put them...
by n-yo-face on Aug 10, 2015

The Pope

A guy was boarding a plane when he heard that the Pope was on the same flight."This is exciting," thought the gentleman. "I've always been a big fanof the Pope. Perhaps I'll be able to see him in person.”Suddenly, the man realized his seat was righ...
by n-yo-face on Aug 4, 2015

Google That

A young boy asked his father, "Dad, is Google a boy or girl?"The boy's father doesn't even look up from his newspaper when he answers."Son, obviously it's a girl, because it wont even let you finish your sentence without suggesting other ideas!"...
by n-yo-face on Jul 28, 2015

Priest's Wife

Jack goes to his friend Mike and says ... "I'm sleeping with the priest's wife. Can you hold him in church for an hour after mass for me?" The friend doesn't like it but being a friend, he agrees. After mass, he starts talking to...
by n-yo-face on Jul 21, 2015

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